This past week has been crazy with all the raining and flooding. At the rate it was going, I thought I would have to swim my way around town. That would have been my cardio of the week! Even with all the craziness, I still managed to get to bootcamp and workout on my own.
My knee still isn't back to normal but it's on its way. Every class I went to and any extra workouts I did, I kept trying to push myself to work hard. When I felt a twinge of pain, I could have stopped and just done the modified version but that's not me. I want to lose weight, get back in to shape and be healthier...happier. So I breathe through the pain and keep working, but I always make sure to listen to my body. I want to continue my journey and not end it becuase of an injury.
I hate being hurt. It makes me feel that the next time I am measured there won't be any change. I know intellectually that that won't be the case but I can't help it. As I ice my knee, it's like an inner battle in my head that i deal with. My friends and family tell me that they can see I've lost weight and they keep pushing me to give up. My brother has een been inspired enough to accompany me during my cardio workouts and eat healhier. The fact that I'm inspiring him is amazing. We've always struggled with our weight but knowing that the changes that i'm making help him...that's fantastic. All the support is encouraging and reminds me why I'm doing this. I'm not doing this just for myself but for others who feel like they can do it. If I can do it, any one can do it. I'd rather be in the house watching TV or reading a book after work or on the weekends but instead, i workout or do something active. This weekend, for example, I spent 6 hours in the back yard breaking down branches, cutting the grass and other yardwork. Something i would spend as little time as possible doing before but not now. I feel anxious and bored if I don't DO something.
Food is still an issue. i need to try harder to eat smaller amounts of food and more often but at times, I'm so busy that time literally runs away from me. By the time I eat lunch, I'm starving and practically trying to swallow my food whole. On weekends, there are times that I'm just not hungry and before i know it, it's 7pm and again, I'm starving. I know better than that. I really do. I just need to focus and not let myself get to that point becuase when I do, I'm not thinking properly. I won't always go for the healthy option but I'll choose whatever I can eat right away. It doesn't mean that I always eat poorly. I'm thankful that every day I pack lunch, dinner and my snacks so that I won't pass my daily caloric intake but instead of spreading it all out for the day, I'll eat two times and call it a day.
My goals this week is not only to keep pushing myself to do better and take care of my knee, but to make sure i eat better. I want to make sure that I lose weight and improve every week and I know that working out will help but eating right will be what helps make a difference in my numbers. I need to focus and if I have to, set up some type of alarm to remind to eat every 3 hours!
I'm anxious for tomorrow. I know that after my measurements are taken, there will be a difference and even if it is small, I need to stay positive and work hard. It's not a race...this is for the long haul.
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